...so you might want to put your order in, now, for this
Because a Phantom mask is the gift that keeps on giving.
Gentlemen, if you want to take the edge off of that conversation about the credit card bill, or turn "brooding" into something sexy, rather than something that gets you screamed at, try this puppy out.
Pop it on when the wife starts to fume a little about the eleventh straight hour of football, this weekend. You don't even need to put on a tux and cape, this mask will work with your ragged Vikings sweatshirt and flannel pants.
Maybe.
Perhaps throw in a sentence or two about "my angel", or "the music of the night". Clean the Cheeto dust off of your fingers, though.
Thought for the Day: Bathroom Etiquette
(Feel free to copy and paste, and use for memory work at your house, or simply tack it on your bathroom door)
When you have your hand on the bathroom door, ready to inform on a sibling, or pose a query to Mommy, ask yourself, "Self, is this so important that I need to interrupt Mommy from completing whatever bodily function brought her here, or stop her from taking two seconds to put a couple of bobby pins in her hair or cover up the circles under her eyes? If I'm relaying some grievance, is it likely that Interrupted Mommy will see things my way, or will her miffed-ness color her opinion? Will taking away some of the precious seconds that Mommy seeks when she goes into this little room help or hurt my cause? Is someone in physical peril? Is the UPS man at the door? Is the sky falling? No? Then maybe it can wait."
